I like this guy and his personality is AMAZING. He’s everything I want EXCEPT I’m not 100% attracted to him. I’ve dated some really hot guys and I’m wondering if that’s ruined dating for me? What do I do?

Yes, guys are not going to have a great personality to women he’s more than platonic with when he can “do better”, and she wants to be BF/GF. Same goes for females — gals are not going to have a great personality to men she’s more than platonic with and she can “do better”, and he wants to be BF/GF.

It’s actually quite a simple concept, but we don’t want to emotionally accept it being like that. :)

And yeah, dating hot guys over time does ante-up your tastes. This is one reason why young gals can get confused & frustrated in the dating scene. They may be kinda-dating particular guys or being FWBs with them, but the guy’s not that into them — thus thinking “guys are so [bleep].” The real issue is that it’s guys you can’t quite fully ‘get’ that are so [bleep] — or shall I say not sufficiently interested — to you.

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Instead, you’re probably really geeked about how he is as a person and you’ve always wanted a guy like that — but when you date hot guys, they lack the persona you’ve always wanted (guys with great personas AND hot are ‘too good’ for you and almost all gals).

Guys, unlike [a vast majority of] gals are not picky at all on looks, to just fool around. You, and most other gals, will actually have a higher ‘bar’ a guy needs to be at in the looks dept to be willing to whimsically fool around VS willing to go out on a romantic date. Guys are in the opposite direction — the girl doesn’t have to be very attractive looking for him willing to fool around; just not ugly to him. Thus, guys have a lower ‘bar’ a girl needs to be at, for him willing to fool around. This is how college-aged women can get confused, as they don’t put this in perspective.

If the thought of “I’m not entirely attracted to him” comes to mind — you’re not attracted to him, if you already got to know him. Sorry, you can’t change it. Maybe in 10 years your tastes will open up. :)

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Don’t make the grave mistake of dating a guy who you’re not that attracted to. Be friends but more than friends (FWB) — if you’re up for that type of thing and are in no hurry to meet a future long-term boyfriend — it’s the “gear” we’re in when we think they’re not bad looking or anything, but we’re not sufficiently attracted to them to romantically date.